Yesterday I spoke to my 89 year old grandmother on the phone. I wanted to try and document the many subjects that were covered:

1) Sex. I’m not entirely sure how or why this came up in conversation, but it did. And the 35 or so seconds that it did come up in the conversation made me uncomfortable. Not exactly the kind of conversation I wanted to have with my grandmother. So I quickly tried, unsuccessfully twice, to change the subject. Fortunately, she moves from topic to topic quickly and we were able to move past this awkward moment.

2) Volunteering. My grandmother is still extremely active and likes to volunteer at events and theaters all over Los Angeles. This gives her an opportunity to do two of the things she does best: (1) Meet and talk to anyone and everyone – she’s extremely friendly and (2) Get free stuff – in this case: shows. She noted, however, that some of the theaters she has been volunteering at, like the new theater at UCLA, were either charging their volunteers to park (which I told her I thought was absurd) or were replacing senior volunteers with kids from the campus.

3) The Elusive “Vents”. My grandmother’s house has central air but the vents are out of her reach and / or hard for her to open and close. I don’t keep tabs on the weather reports in the Los Angeles area on a regular basis but, for whatever reason, whenever I talk to her, the vents need to be either opened or closed.

4) The VCR / DVD / TV Debacle. Similar to the vents issue above, somehow my grandmother always manages to press the one button on her remote or on the VCR, DVD, or TV that causes them all to stop functioning at once. Fortunately, it sounded like my brother dropped by and fixed the issue when it happened recently.

5) Casino. As I indicated above, there is no one more adept at getting free stuff than my grandmother. She is always traveling to casinos on trips with senior groups – to Henderson, Las Vegas, and some “Indian” casinos closer to home – for free. She described her latest trip in detail and, if my calculations are correct (and they should be as she described the trip in minute detail) – accounting for the $1 she paid to have her car “locked up so it was safe” before she got on the bus that took them there, the food and slot credits, and tips – the casino actually paid her approximately $17.50 to go to their casino and hang out.